Aside from the fact that many children are growing up in homes where convenience foods are the norm, the act of eating has ceased to be a family occasion. Statistics suggest that only 39% of families in the UK eat as a family around the dinner table.
When I was a child family meal times were a pivotal part of the day, what we learnt at the table was how to communicate, how to listen, how to show respect, this was called table manners it wasn't snobbery but egalitarian, a lesson in social etiquette, open to all, free, hence the saying: good manners cost nothing.
Compare that with children's homeschooling today, children are left to sit in front of the TV with food on their laps, invariably food that they eat with their hands. It is evident that families are no longer eating around the dinner table because when they are in a restaurant environment children are climbing down from the table, spilling food, having tantrums......and parents seem powerless to control them. Look at an average restaurant table and you will see mobile phones and keys sprawled across it, hardly a good example to set, table manners have gone underground like a gene that has skipped a generation.
It is no coincidence that children whose parent's have paid attention to instilling good table manners in them develop into adults with good social skills. Conversation is how we become human. The word 'infant' literally means 'without the possibility of phatic expression.' Sitting around a table exchanging conversation is what makes us come together as a kindred species, without exchange, part of our humanity is lost. Children left to their own devices at meal times are missing out on fundamental skills.
Teachers and educational experts said the decline in children's social skills had become entrenched over the last decade. The term 'loving neglect' regarding parents whose busy lives lead them to be too soft to impose rules or boundaries ie sitting down to dinner, are the root of the problem.
'Lots of children don't know how to use a knife and fork' headmistress Anna Traer Goffe said in a recent article. 'They are often given something to eat in front of the TV or have to eat on their own because parents eat later. With that comes a lack of key social skills such as listening to others, saying please or thank you and taking turns.'
For me, eating together as a family and with friends is a celebration, occasions that provide great memories. As Epicurus said: 'we should look for someone to eat with before looking for something to eat, for dining alone is leading the life of a lion or wolf.'
I have posted this next dish once before but it is so good I thought it was worth re posting. This is a preparation rather than a recipe per se, it comes courtesy of a friend of mine who like me has a great love of life's dining table and its menu of morals, as she says: 'we all eat, and it would be a sad waste of opportunity to eat badly!'
Best steak ever
Recipe
Serves 2
1 steak per person
2 onions, peeled and sliced
1 teaspoon dijon mustard per steak
2 cloves garlic, peeled and crushed
A good glug of olive oil
A splash of malt vinegar
1 glass red wine
Salt and pepper
Remove steaks from fridge
In a bowl combine onions, mustard, garlic, oil and vinegar
Season well
Massage this mixture into steaks and set aside for at least 1 hour
Heat a large pan, add a splash of olive oil and allow to get shimmering hot
Remove excess marinade from steaks
Drop steaks directly into pan so that the whole surface hits the heat simultaneously
Cook steaks: rare 1 1/2 minutes per side
Medium 2 minutes per side
Well done 4-5 minutes per side
Use a spatula to gently press down on the surface, turn steak at half time
Remove steaks from pan, set aside covered in a foil tent
Over a high heat cook marinade in the same pan for 5 minutes
De glaze pan with a large glass of red wine
Place steaks on warm plates, top with marinade and sticky glaze
Serve immediately
'When your spouse is talking; turn off the television
When your child is talking turn off the world.'
- Crystal Delarm Clymer
'My mother is my friend
Who shares with me her bread
All my hopelessness cured
Her company makes me secured.'
- Israelmore Ayivor
Love Donna xxxxxxxx
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